writings: DECEMBER 2004 - CATCH-UP

Well, I said I would, and I am. Under the weight of my perfectionistic tendencies, I have delayed getting a new journal entry out for some time. The sheer magnitude of covering all events now passed makes it easier and easier to put off. This is exactly how I can suddenly go from forgetting to return a friend’s phone call for a week to not speaking with him for six months. Ummmm...

Who gives a damn anyway. I will strike out from the present and delve into the past as whimsy allows. I did start something about the last European run:

HAIL EUROPA: PLANES, TRAINS, BUSES, CARS... A BOAT, NEARLY

From the cozy confines of the Doubletree Hotel in Alsip, Illinois, the stunning Western Fjords of Norway seem very, very far away. But I was there, I’m sure of it... no, it couldn’t have been a dream, I have pictures, I have skin white and slightly bloated with the residual salt of multiple meat and cheese encounters. Come with me, friends, let’s relive the legacy...

My wife and I endured three crowded flights over eighteen hours to reach Oslo. Having my favorite traveling companion along for the interminable ride made things far more enjoyable. She seemed slightly perplexed by my traditional ingestion of three pints of lager in Heathrow at 9:00 AM local time, but a marriage is nothing if not a journey. It was 5:00 somewhere.

On the bus ride into the city we were struck by how much Scandinavian design has completely infiltrated and defined every aspect of what we foreigners refer to as ‘modern.’ We passed barns that looked more progressive than most new performing arts centers in American cities. Traipsing through the rest of the country over the next week, I would come to realize that, comparably speaking, Oslo had a slightly cold feeling to it. But at the time of our arrival it seemed to be stone, glass and steel Nirvana sprung up out of carpet of evergreen. Neither of us had ever been to a place with such an unmistakable air of newness about it.

After checking into the hotel and taking a much-needed nap, we headed out for a Thai restaurant that had been described as cheap and tasty by our Lonely Planet guidebook. It was indeed tasty, but the arrival of the bill quickly put to rest all hopes we had kindled about anything in Scandinavia being cheap. We stopped by an Internet cafe on the way back to the hotel, then a 7-11, which are in no short supply in Norway. After sampling a few funky candy bars at the hotel, we snuggled into our single berths and slept.

The next morning we sampled our first Norwegian breakfast, a complicated buffet replete with several varieties of the aforementioned breads, meats and cheeses, as well as soft-boiled eggs, various pickled cole slaws and little squeeze tubes of ground salmon eggs called KAVIAR. Suitably fed, we wandered down to a castle overlooking the bay.

I was reunited with Andy Nice in the hotel lobby a few hours later. We walked to the gig for sound check, then had a pint in an outdoor cafe on a large square when the sound engineer proved to be absent. Andy had recently returned from a lovely holiday in Slovenia where he was unmercifully demonized for swimming naked in the pool of a resort. I assured him that skinny-dipping was completely accepted, if not expected, in Norway. A wide, expectant smile spread over his face as the sun was overtaken by clouds that began spitting rain onto our little round table.

The gig that night at Cafe Mono was good, well performed and well-received. No

Charleston, South Carolina seems a long way from Alsip, Illinois. Charleston, South Carolina makes Oslo, Norway seem like another planet. I drove to my gig tonight through a blanket of fog covering a nearly empty I-26, occasional headlights in soft focus letting me know that there was actually other life forms traversing this planet of mist. I had the sensation that if I just gunned it really hard my rented Nissan Altima would simply rear back and take flight, becoming one with the earthen clouds that obscured mortal vision. SR-17 spread out over a very high bridge crossing what appeared to be a vast expanse of Cumulus Nimbus, stretching the flight metaphor to very realistic proportions.

On nights like tonight all of this feels more like time travel than a job. I think that Charleston, South Carolina would be a great place to grow up, to dream of leaving, then rediscovering at a later age. I watched the kid that opened up for me tonight guzzling a shot as I hurried out the door, hauling gear, practically running back to the anonymous comfort of middle age in the Airport Radisson. I could see the need for confusion in his eyes, leering out from under a slight misinterpretation of the Strokes Haircut. The badge, the requirement of progress. For a brief moment I wanted to go there with him, pretend like I was stupid enough to want it all over again, want that, instead of my father’s carefully prepared path of traveling salesman heartbreak.

Alsip, Illinois, or somewhere close: I’m watching Joan Baez, whom I am opening a couple of shows for, take the stage. The very seated and fairly mature crowd of 1200 goes as nuts as their possibly disappointing lives will allow them to go for an icon of sixties youth. God, what it must have been like to be young in the sixties. I see the weight of the vision preached to these people when I talk to them after the show, their hair gone mousy, the skin on their faces a road map to somewhere less disagreeable. One lady tells me she doesn’t like my lyrics; she likes Joan’s, she likes things with a message, and I’m wondering if the intellectual laziness that the preaching of the sixties birthed is any different from the black-and-white couchpotatosity that props up our current ruling class, the Christian Right. Later that night, a one man party at the Doubletree featuring many letters written and never sent by the power of Almighty Jameson’s.

Rock Hill, South Carolina tomorrow. One would assume that most hills are made of rock. I must be missing the joke, again.